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Joseph Grieco, 37, remained held in the Morris County Correctional Facility in Morristown in connection with the July 26 death of retired NYPD Officer John Kelly, who had deep ties in Bergen County.
The single aggravated manslaughter charge cites an "extreme indifference to human life."
Under New Jersey law, that means the defendant didn't set out to kill the victim but acted in such a reckless and unreasonable manner that death was a distinct possibility.
It often involves defendants who authorities say were drunk or drugged at the time.
Grieco was arrested a week ago, on Aug. 21, records show, yet the Sussex County Prosecutor's Office hasn't announced the development yet. Details were expected following the publication of this story.
Grieco claimed from the start that his husband was killed in a freak accident.
The couple had recently bought a plot of land less than 100 yards from the New York State border in Glenwood, an unincorporated area within Vernon Township.
They were building a new home there and had taken an apartment nearby in the meantime, those who knew them said.
Vernon Township police were called to the residence around 1 a.m. July 26, "for a discharge of a weapon with injuries," the Sussex County Prosecutor's Office said in a statement at the time.
The victim was taken to a local hospital, "where he later passed away," the statement says.
In a tribute to his partner of 14 years -- the past three of which he said they spent together every day -- Grieco wrote of how he "didn't understand the true heaviness" that Kelly's life had on his until that night.
"I wish that freak accident never happened," Grieco wrote, "but unfortunately freak accidents are always a game of what ifs… constant moments of steps that led to a single moment, followed by horrific grief."
He later removed the post.
Grieco, who was Tenafly's first openly gay police officer, was forced into retirement after an extended medical leave. He'd been suffering from what he told a Pride in Tenafly gathering last year were cardiac, neurological and mental issues caused by long COVID.
Friends said Grieco drew strength from the man he said was "always the better half."
"I remember first watching you sleep, so peacefully and I’d do so for years and years after, occasionally giving you a kiss on your forehead but not to wake you," Grieco wrote in tribute to his late husband. " Years filled with laughter, sadness, happiness, arguments, love, struggles that only we knew about.
Kelly was on the Englewood Board of Adjustment and was a former president of the Board of Directors of The Residences at Flat Rock Square Condo Association and a former parliamentarian with the Englewood Democratic Club.
Mayor Michael Wildes said he appointed Kelly to positions "knowing full well he loved our [c]ity and was kind and caring."
Kelly "touched the lives of so many people and tried to improve conditions for those he loved," the mayor added. "He often represented me at functions and was gracious in his handling of delicate policy matters."
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